Seasons

Dear Zonk,

I have a theory about friends and life and major life events.

Things happen in seasons. When you have a bunch of people you’re really close to, the graphs of your lives start to sync up. If someone in your circle starts out on a new relationship, chances are that someone else will be starting one too. That’s Hookup Season. A much more common phenomenon — sadly — is Breakup season. If one couple breaks up, brace yourselves and squint up your eyes. Someone else is gonna be going down soon. At least, that’s what I’ve seen in my own circles.

I’ve always believed this to be true about such things. But lately, a newer, fainter pattern has begun to emerge. I’ve begun to notice that it’s not just life events that happen in seasons — entire moods come in seasons too. We tend to be happy together, and sad together, and anxious together, and fuck-this-shit-I-quit together. Or maybe it’s only true this one time, and will never occur with such simultaneity again. But this is where we’re at right now. Right now our season is Blue. 

Not a bittersweet, translucent blue, either. This one’s a heavy, stormy swirl of inky blackish-blue. The kind that drops down your throat and lodges itself in your gut and stains you from the inside out and makes it hard to get out of bed in the mornings.

You know.

I wish we could skip this part, Zonk. I wish we could fast forward too where we’re done dealing with whatever it is that’s sapping the strength out of us. I wish we could go to bed tonight and wake up in a timeline where everything’s all figured out and sorted and we’re the happiest versions of ourselves that we could be. But we can’t. I guess we just need to wait it out. A happier season will roll around soon.

But for now, I’m sorry all this shit is happening, Zonk. To you, you, you, you and you. That’s one ‘you’ for each one of you that’s dealing with more than they can handle tonight. And me, I’ll be the 6th ‘you’.

Oh well.  We’ll be okay soon.

I feel it in my bones.

*hug*

Love always,
K.