Vox Imports

pale..

There's a place between sleep and sleep where things go in the time before they fade away. And stay. Like wide awake dreams that only haunt you while you try to forget. Things that shimmer sadly. Like an unshut eye drowned in a sea that stares at you till it sinks down to the ocean floor. Like dreams that get in the way of living that you kill to simply survive that make you squirm in their stench when they lie pale and purpling in the sun. While you step over them and know somewhere that this was the price you paid when you tried to forget what you'd give anything to remember now. Like a turned-in hand. Like a drunken dream. Like the taste of water in your mouth..and three songs you'll never play again.

Maybe you'll look back someday and catch a glimpse of me on the tail end of a memory. Of how I used to be. Maybe it will be a Tuesday and maybe the thought will make you smile.

 

There's things you write just once and never again. Like songs. Like pale naked truth. 
Like this.
For.

 

 

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Vox Imports

Uh oh

Hello again. A new day calls for a customary new blog post (unless its the weekend or a national holiday)

Note: I was going to say BANK holiday instead of NATIONAL holiday, but backspaced cos people could get confused and think I'm a teller in a bank or something. Wouldn't wanna mislead anyone. But then again, maybe if I was an eyebrow-threader in a beauty parlour I wouldn't have minded the deception that much… Point being I got a cool job and now you know it. So much for subtlety.

So anyway, about my customary new post. You see, I really DID have something in mind, but I digressed too much and now I forgot what it was. So I'll start with some other random thing. *changes title of post*. There.

Other Random Thing: I've been calculating, and I know now that I'm exactly 19 years, 5 months, and 16 days old.(Fun Activity For Probably Bored Readers: Calculate again and tell me when my birthday is, and I'll give you a cookie. And if you're smarter than you look- I'M WATCHING YOU- you'll just go check the date on orkut or facebook or something)
But stick with me. There's a point. I swear. Just gimme a minute to make it up.

Point: I've spent a lot of my life sleeping. Of course, sleep patterns change as you grow older.. you sleep lesser and stuff. Also you try to make sure your mouth is not hanging open and you're not drooling or making dirty noises or farting in your sleep. Little kids, on the other hand, can be ugly as hell when they sleep and people will still find them cute. Please make sure you're not an ugly sleeper..it could break up your marriage. Someday when I'm rich and jobless or feeling industrious or else merely losing my marbles, I'll start a sleeping-beauty parlour of some sort where you can train people to sleep in strait-jackets with their mouths clamped shut.

Actual Point: I don't sleep much anymore and I'm hoping I never become an insomniac but right now I'm not bored enough to elucidate.

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Vox Imports

Evermore.

Theory # __

 

Theory number x. The only one I intend to discuss here, too. Because I have been thinking, now, about the choices that we make. The choices that we are forced to make. And the time we spend making them. Thinking again a thousand times so we know for sure that we won't regret tomorrow the things we do today. So we don't regret tomorrow all the things we never did. And what if, at the end of a lifetime of shaping our own destinies, in the minutes before we die, its all that we did not choose that flashes before our eyes? What if the last thing you see is everything you gave up? The violin bow buried under cuff-links and ties, the child you let die, the girl you did not pick. And you learn that you spent all your life crawling towards nothing but an end, that you gave up everything you needed on the way to what you thought was home. That it wasn't home. That what will wipe the smile off your face is not death, but life itself.

Goodbye. 

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Vox Imports

_______________

I am the little person in my head- eyes screwed shut and humming. And if a smile shaped love came knocking at my door and said- Hello, I've come again I'd say Go away. You've killed me once before. And if Life whispered in my ear to tell me Come wake, there's more to see, I'd stay, I'd wish it away. I'd say I've been through living before.

I've been through living before.

I haven't died, but I've been through living before.

 

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