Bye-bye, Step One

If you come here often enough, then you probably also talk to me often enough, and that means you already know that I quit my job two days ago.

It was not a bad job, Zonk; my boss was sweet and the people were awesome and the work was sometimes fun. So if you ask me exactly why I quit, I’d have to sit you down and you’d have to buy yourself a few drinks and listen for a couple of hours while I told you why. And I’d probably still not explain it right and you’d probably still not see it. And I don’t know if I’d really even try to make you see it.  Because who you are sometimes decides what it is that you understand.

And I don’t understand a ten hour job that brings me no happiness. Nor any money. And I don’t know if I did the wrong thing, giving up on a  place that old with a name that big. And maybe I’ll live to regret this someday. But when you work ten hours a day almost everyday, and the best that you have to show for it is all the doodles in your book – you know that something’s just not right.

I see too many people around me who are thirty and stuck in jobs they don’t really like. And thirty is sometimes too late to do anything about anything… A wise man once told me to Fail Fast. Because there is only so much time you are given to figure out how the rest of your life is going to be. Don’t waste it in making up numbers that are but nails grinding into place in the lids of your mold.

And so, I quit a job that most people would be willing to grow old in. Within six months of taking it up. And I know that not everybody thinks I’m doing the right thing. And maybe, just maybe, I’m not.

But something’s gotta give.

For now, I’m happy. And I’m going to leave you with a bunch of little drawings I did at different points on the job during the last six months. The ones with thread taped to the top were originally tied to helium balloons and stuck on my wall. But the balloons died and I ended up just hanging them from thumb tacks on my board. Oh well.

They all fit in a single scan.

Doodles

And this.

doodle

Love always,
K.

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Author: Kirtana K

I paint and make music and blog like a maniac. These days I try to run. But I have chicken legs and lungs the size of two-rupee balloons. I fail. I like pajamas and striped socks and books that read like song and songs that sound like poetry and strangers who read this page. And Maggi when I'm sick or cold or sad or celebrating. They'll find noodles in my veins if ever they cut me open. And potatoes. And maybe a tiny bit of whiskey. I'll be an Unidentified Living Object and they'll put my insides on display. It will be crazy. It will be awesome. It will.

5 thoughts on “Bye-bye, Step One”

  1. You have no idea how similar your life and mine are, do you?

    I don’t think we can ever explain to anyone why. It’s not like we don’t like this job, in fact it’s great and I know that this job can make so many people happy but for me personally – no I don’t think so.

    Call it what you may but when something’s not right, it’s not. Maybe it’s my heart telling me to grow some courage and go back to the other side of infinite possibilities not restricted by a 10 hour-a-day-work-life or maybe I am some pursuing some long forgotten fate.

    Though I am not sure too you know because I have been out there before and I know how much discipline freedom demands and how I failed miserably the first time around. This may even be the worst decision of my life but yeah, something has gotta give.

    Keep us updated on what’s happening. Take Care.

    Sai

    1. Ah..
      no I had no idea. I’m glad you quit whatever it was you were doing and I’m sure you’ll treat your freedom better this time. What Are you doing, by the way, if you don’t mind me asking?
      Me, I have the next few steps planned out already. Let’s see how it goes. I will update as and when things happen, as I always do on this page.
      You take care too.
      :)

      1. Hmmm…..I quit my job. Took a vacation, ran out of money. Joined another out of panic just to realize how foolish I was. Now quit that too with even lesser money left than last time but am slowly getting back to realizing why all of the shit was worth it.

        I’ve finally got a band going, you can check our music here – http://soundcloud.com/the-indus-valley-project. And besides that, I’m working on a book : ]

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