Okay, in all my wanderings through cyberspace (which has been as limited as my wandering through physical space– I think I'm doomed to grow old and die in my corner of the world, which is fine, but I wish that corner wasn't in Thane), I've come to realize that we humans are a bored race. There's no particular reason I'm saying that. Except if I scroll to the bottom of my vox page it says Popular Hobbies in India: How to Make A Website, How To Make A Blog, How To Tie a Tie, How To Get Rid Of Groin Rash, How To Evict Insects and/or Little People From Your Nose hair etc etc. And no kidding, I did not make that up. Well. Not all of it at least. Point being, which bored fuck actually makes an entire effing site about How To Tie A Tie? (There was Ian who did that cool site about shoelaces, but Ian's different, he's the Shaman of Shoelaces or something.) And if I wanted to know How To Make A Blog, why the fuck is vox linking me to another site, seeing as its full of blogs itself? I don't know about you, but I'm Indian, and I can promise you my hobbies are slightly more interesting than any of that.
I give up. I'll put away my paintings of naked children and my couch and cigar and my copy of An Interpretation of Dreams. No point going all Freudian on bored website-makers. They exist. Boredom makes people do strange things. Just last week I wrote a long-ass post about peas. I'm really sorry if any of you read that. Shouldn't subject you'll to shit like that. I try to write sensibly, I really do. But I guess I'm often bored too. Its just that its depressing when everybody you know lives two train-rides away. And the only real hang-out-withable friend (I <3 Ila) who lives nearby is not as jobless the average person. (Read: Average = Me). So if you want to even chill, you have to go on a fucking daytrip. And then they'll tell you roam around too much. I don't. I just need to move to a different place. A western suburb. Bandra or Andheri or something. Even Borivli will do. It gets fucking lonely here!
Do me a favour, people, if ever I get bord enough to make a site called How To Smudge Your Kohl or something, please come over and gimme a hug and chill with me for a bit. After which you can slap me and tell me to stop telling lies because please Kitu, you know you can't have made a site. But yes, you are a good Smudger of Kohl…
Fucking Universe. Atleast gimme a teleporter or something. Then see how I'll fully stop whining.
But until then.