So. Those little green things in the pic up there are peas. Pretty self-evident, you may point out, but don't be so sure, dear Reader. Those may look like peas to you, and they are peas, and you're allowed to feel smart for having guessed. But think twice before you judge a misrecognizer of said peas…plenty of people may think those are marbles, and thats okay, even if they are not marbles, and you have no right to judge them for being stupid. If there's one thing I've always tried to uphold in every article I put up on this blog, its the virtue of Tolerance. Don't judge people. Don't point fingers at them. Don't make fun of them if they're ugly. Don't swear. And I'd love to continue in this thread and help you strengthen your moral fibre, but frankly my dear, I don't give a damn. (Tell me where the quote's from and I'll give you a pea. I've tried this before, but nobody replied. Either you'll are illiterate, or you have better things to do. In which case, fuck you if you know and you're not gonna play along. Go troll on some other blog you ungrateful parasite.)
Now to get to the point: PEAS. A pea (sometimes inaccurately called a sweet pea by food distributors) is most commonly the small spherical seed or the seed-pod of the legume Pisum sativum. Each pod contains several peas. Although treated as a vegetable in cooking, it is botanically a fruit.
That's what you'd get if you if ever you tried to wiki ''pea". I suggest you don't wiki it anyway. Unless you're writing an article about peas too. In which case I'll have to sue you for copycatism. Or maybe I'll screw the legalities and set one of my giant sized friends after you. I have a collection of those for just such occasions. Very obliging they are, too.
And here is the real point of this post. Listen carefully. Cos if I was saying this instead of writing it, I wouldn't repeat it. Those little green vegetables you pop weren't originally called peas. That thing you keep eating with your maggi and stuff was originally called a BAGOO. That was till 1952. When Finnish hotstuff Armi Kuusella became the first ever Miss Universe. And said she wanted World Peace. Pretty soon, everyone who walked a ramp and was allowed near a microphone was asking for World Peace. One thing led to another, and a few dyslexic models and several haggard journalists later, it just became convenient to rename the vegetable and call it a PEA. Cos no one would believe a magazine that said models ate non-violence or co-operation. And don't tell me peas existed way before 1952. I'm sure that internet sources and history books are full of such mentions, but if there's one thing I've tried to teach you, it's to not be gullible.
Peas didn't exist before 1952, honey, Bagoos did, and anyone who tells you otherwise is simply trying to brainwash you. And you're not gonna fall for that are you now?
And incase you're wondering why I've spilled the peas– oops! beans– today, here's why.
(Chat with Sharvari Sastry)