Vox Imports

Dave Genius Matthews

Dave Unfairly Gifted Matthews.

I don't know about you, but sometimes when I hear a really good song, in my head I'm thinking- Fuck. Wish I'D written that song.

So today on my way to work I was listening to The Dreaming Tree (and fat ladies who are secretly confident that they could be the next Indian idol, given a chance. Thankfully nobody'll ever give them that chance. So instead of the entire nation suffering, its only us chosen few in crowded locals that get to hear the divas sing. And all we can do is cringe as inconspicuously as possible, concentrate on our shoes, and turn up the volume on our ipods in the hope that Dave Matthews can out-sing Fat Aunty, Fat Aunty, and Fat Aunty.)

Point being, I was listening to Dreaming Tree, and my head went like- Fuck I wish I'D written that song. Now Dreaming Tree happens to be a pretty long song, so my head kept going- fuck I wish I'd written that song. Then my playlist moved on to White Stripes, but my head was still stuck on Dave Matthews, going- fuck I wish I'D written that song.

Which was when it struck me that I very rarely listen to more than 3 DMB songs at a go, though I like the music. I figured that I just get tired of listening to my head when it goes into a repetitive mode. And Dave Genius makes ONLY brilliant songs, with Fucking Complicated Compositions. And even if the compositions not that complex, he'll have a million instruments making it sound all fancy. And if its a simple song, with only guitars, then he'll have Tim Reynolds playing it. Which of course means that my head goes- Fuck I wish I could play like that. Also (I'd like my head to note this please) its not very nice to keep saying "fuck". Pretty mannerless, if you ask me.

Now here's a few speculations about how Dave Matthews became a genius:

  • when he was a kid he had no friends. So he spent all his childhood practising, and grew up to become DAVE MATTHEWS.
  • he's really not a genius. The compositions belong to the anonymous Band. Dave is the frontman cos he happens to look better than the rest of them, and has a reasonably nice voice.
  • He's Beethoven reborn or something. This theory is pretty easy to verify- if Dave wakes up deaf on his 40th birthday and keeps composing, then he IS Beethoven reborn.

So thats about it for Dave. Now I'll come to terms with the fact that I'm NOT jobless today. This morning blog post is just out of habit now. Sheesh.


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